Modern Femme loves...all things Martha

We all know I am a Martha devotee, but even I couldn't help but laugh at myself this morning as I unpacked my breakfast and lunch at my desk. 

Do I own enough of Martha's products (and these are just the ones at work, mind you)?   From left to right: Martha's Sistema breakfast and lunch caddies, Martha's Avery Home Office file folders, Discbound notebook, and assorted Martha Stack and Fit desk accessories.

All hail the queen.
xoxo
MF

Drum Roll Please....My 2013 Personal Goals!

Hello my dears and happy Friday!  I don't know about where you are, but it's colder than a witch's heart here.  But this cold can't keep me down - after weeks of consideration, I'm excited and ready to share my 2013 goals with you guys! 

You might remember that in November I spoke about my goal setting process.  I've spent the last two months thinking about my personal development in 2013, and here are the goals I've come up with, in broad strokes:   

1. Fitness:  Maintain and increase my physical exercise. Incorporate more vegetables, fruits, lean proteins and whole grains into my (and my family's) daily consumption.
2. Career:  Strengthen my skill set by taking continuing education classes.  Look for a new career opportunity.
3. Intellectual:  Read more non-fiction books and watch more documentaries.
4. Cultural:  Take Bebe to museums and kid-friendly events.  Take some family weekend trips.
5. Spiritual:  Attend church regularly.  Volunteer with my church.
6. Wild Card:  Month of Glam project, as inspired by the lovely Dita Von Teese!

Now, that sounds all well and good, but we're not stopping there.  I've unpacked those broad goals using the SMART (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic, and Timely) filter:

Fitness:  Walk 2+ miles every weekday.  Do 45 - 60 minutes of yoga once a week. Consume two additional cups of vegetables and fruits at least 3 days a week, through such mediums as the Glowing Green Smoothie.  Cook with whole grains such as quinoa and brown rice at least twice a week. Cook fish once a month.  Drink at least 64 ounces of water during a weekday, and at least 32 ounces of water on a weekend-day. 

Career:  Write a statement of intent describing my desired next position in my professional community of practice. Take at least two professional classes this calendar year. Check twice a week (Monday and Friday) on job-post forums to see if any new opportunities match my statement.  Apply as appropriate.

Intellectual:  Read at least two non-fiction books this year (possible candidates: Bringing Up Bebe, The Omnivore's Dilemma).  Watch at least four documentaries.

Cultural:  Take Bebe out to at least one museum or kid-friendly event every month. Plan two weekend overnight trips (one in winter/spring, and one in summer) to areas within a three-hour drive from our house.

Spiritual:  Attend at least two church services every month.  Volunteer with my church at least once this year to cook meals for the homeless.

Wild Card:  Undertake and document the Month of Glam project in May 2013. 

Do you see what a difference it makes to get really specific about your goals?  When I apply the SMART filter to my original goals, I go from well-intentioned but vague statements to specific and measurable action items.  Now, of course, the challenge is to implement them! 

I will be entering reminder alerts into my iPhone and work calendars to remind me of some of these action points.  Putting a specific date (such as May for the Month of Glam project), also helps to solidify and target a goal that might have otherwise gotten pushed off over and over again throughout the year. 

What do you think of my goals?  And what goals have you set for yourselves in this new year?

xoxo,
MF

P.S. Am excited to announce that the next posting in the Embracing Change series will be going up next week!  Stay tuned!!

Defining and Setting Goals

We have heard a lot about goals for the country these past 12+ months.  Goals for the economy, goals for social programs, goals for small business and families, etc etc.  Soon people will begin to set goals for themselves for 2013, most likely related to fitness (ever notice how more ads for gyms pop up on the TV, radio and in print around this time of year?).

I am a frequent goal-setter...but not so much a goal "do-er."  I can articulate goals with great fan-fare, enthusiasm, and panache.  I write them down on fancy looking lists.  I even define the steps that would land me at the goal.  And then...

FULL STOP

I stick my list of goals in a file, which languishes on my desk, in drawers, in bags, or hidden underneath magazines.  Many, many, months later I will find the list, and think "Darn.  Forgot about this. Oh well," and then go about my day.  It's as if the goals never existed, were a pleasant distraction to contemplate, but ultimately not meant to see the light of day.

That's not to say that I've never had a goal that I've achieved - I certainly have.  But in terms of consistently articulating, planning and executing annual goals, well there I am all talk, no walk.

But I keep trying!  This year, I set goals for myself in the following categories:

• Fitness:  The most cliched of goals, perhaps.  No explanation needed, right? Just move your bottom.
• Career:   Either related to advancing in a current position, or moving on to a new opportunity, or strengthening your skill set in your current career.
• Intellectual:  Exercising your brain - whether by taking classes on a new subject, or learning more about an issues by reading non-fiction books/watching documentaries on a topic, going back to school for a degree, etc.
• Cultural:  Getting out to see museum exhibits, attending concerts, going to the theater (not the movie theater!), or a dance performance.
• Spiritual:  Attending regular services, meditating, reading on related topics.
• Wild Card:  This category is fun and dynamic - it could be a random long weekend in Vegas, or buying a gift for yourself that you would normally never buy.

I listed out my goals for each category, taking care to make sure they were SMART, laid out the steps I would need to follow in order to achieve them, and then...
 
                                                                        FULL STOP

But hey, if the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results, then call me crazy, cause I'm getting ready to try again!  There are a lot of resources on the Internet with free printables that help with goal articulation and execution.  I like Work Your Way, and Buttoned Up.  Both of these sites offer advice on goal setting and attainment, and have really helpful free printables.

If you need help just articulating what types of things you might want to make into goals, Work Your Way has this mind map that is really helpful for brainstorming :

Once you've identified some goals, Buttoned Up has a lot of useful printables, such as this goal list form: 

I'm going to take the next few weeks to think about my 2013 goals, articulate them and set up the steps for achievement.  Won't you join me (either in spirit or in action)? 

To forward momentum,
xoxo,
MF

Modern Femme loves...9 Lives for Women

I'm excited to announce that I've been featured over at 9 Lives for Women, a multi-channel blog about the different life stages working women transverse.  Kathryn Sollmann, 9 Lives' Managing Partner and Founder, interviewed me on my experience returning to work as a new mother and surviving the "motherhood guilts."  You can read the post here.

I really enjoy reading Kathryn's insightful posts on the various issues women deal with in their professional lives.  Whether it be trying to break into (or back into) the work force, deciding whether to stay on your current career path, or how to make the most of your retirement planning, 9 Lives for Women has something for everyone.  Here is what the blog is all about, in Kathryn's own words:

9 Lives is a multi-channel blog site that speaks directly to women in 9 distinct life stages in and out of the workforce.  I developed the concept after a decade of helping women find ways to restart or advance their careers.  From this experience, I know that from college years to retirement years women live many lives—both in and out of the workforce.  There’s not one set path…we choose or try to make the best of many twists and turns.

We juggle paid and unpaid work with complex family responsibilities. We often have one foot in and one foot out of the workforce.  We search for ways to earn both green and “psychic” dollars. We have stops and starts and times when we don’t feel like the person who got that amazing degree or held that prestigious job. We want to feel productive, engaged and valued at every age and stage, and we look to other smart women for advice and encouragement.

Some women move sequentially through the “9 Lives”–and many others move back and forth or feel stalled in one particular stage.  9 Lives gives you the confidence to move on, or the conviction that you’re exactly where you honestly want to be.  

Click “Which Blog is For You?”  to find your work/life stage and a growing library of blog posts that will give you practical advice and encouragement.

Welcome to the 9 Lives community…read, recharge and join the conversation!

I encourage you all to check it out!

xoxo,
MF

Modern Femme at Work....Classic Black Pumps

Like the little black dress, women face a dizzying selection when contemplating that classic work wardrobe staple, the black leather pump.  I myself have owned a least six different pairs, all worn into the ground (or marched to the Goodwill box). 

With history comes lessons learned:  from heels that could double as ice picks, to overly pointed toe-boxes (that could double as ice picks), to cheap faux-leather-that's-really-plastic and rubs off all your skin, to chic-orthopedic, I've owned all the bad (and in some cases, the ugly) that can come in a black heeled package.

Which is why I RAN and not walked to DSW when I saw these heels.  After a long, painful, and occasionally dowdy drought, I've finally found a classically silhouetted black leather heel that looks beautiful, fits comfortably, and goes with everything.  Ladies (and gentlemen - we're equally opportunity here at Modern Femme), may I introduce "Rylie" from LAUREN Ralph Lauren.

These beauties live under my desk, because I wear them at least three times a week.  Their stacked heel and almond toe make them comfortable to be in all day, the leather is good-quality with just the right amount of luster, and aesthetically these pumps look good peeking out from under trouser hems, or on full display with a pencil skirt.  They come at a price point most of us can live with (especially if you can find them at DSW, as I did).  And they are from Ralph, whom I adore.

So beautiful, no?

xoxo,
MF

Modern Femme at Work...My Work Space

In my first job, I was an executive assistant to a senior executive.  I loved working for my boss - he was brilliant, kind, and patient.  He also was a hoarder of paper.  When you walked into his office you were greeted by stacks and stacks of papers.  They were everywhere - on his desk, on his meeting table, on chairs, even on the floor.  It would give me hives - followed by an uncontrollable urge to clean his workspace.

But it worked for him.  He knew exactly what was in each and every pile, and could fish a single sheet of paper out of a dangerously tilting mountain of documents.  He had a system, and each of those stacks of paper were an integral part of it.  I once volunteered to file all those papers (what was I thinking? It would have taken forever!), and he swiftly turned my offer down, spreading his arms protectively in front of his filing system, keeping me at bay.  I'm sure had I filed all those papers, he would have been at a serious disadvantage - it would have taken him hours to find in a file what he could find in seconds in a pile.

I, on the other hand, couldn't be more opposite.  The sight of all that paper made me incredibly anxious.  I marveled at the fact that my boss was able to get anything done, as I would have been paralyzed, rendered catatonic at the thought of finding anything in that, well, mess. My work space system is one of rigorous minimalism.  There are exactly five things on my desk: an inbox, two picture frames, a pretty calender, and a pen holder.  Any papers that are not immediately in use must be either in my inbox, or filed away, but never laying about.  My desk drawers are brimming with meticulously labeled files, most of which house a combination of notes from meetings, deliverables, and reference materials.  

I crave order, not because I'm a control freak (well, maybe a little), but because I shut down when surrounded by clutter.  I feel overwhelmed and my brain capacity goes from 60 miles an hour to 5 miles an hour.  This is true for both paper clutter and virtual clutter - I rigorously prune my email, filing emails or deleting them, and leaving only a handful for action in my inbox.  Besides being rendered comatose by visual clutter, another major reason I maintain such a strict system is that I have a terrible memory, and I need to ensure that documents and emails that I need to find are in places that I can easily remember and access.

If Al Gore is on one end of the messy desk/minimalist desk spectrum...

And Martha Stewart is on the other...

I am off of the middle, leaning more towards Martha.  

And my ideal work setup? It would be even more minimalist, with any computer equipment and filing systems cleverly disguised from view, sleek modern furniture, and as much open space and light as possible.   Just looking at the above office (from "The Devil Wears Prada") makes me feel alert and energized.

What is your ideal work space?

xoxo,

MF

Modern Femme at Work...My work wardrobe

My closet has two sides to it - professional Modern Femme, and private life Modern Femme, and the twain shall never meet. I can remember the outfit I wore to my first job interview - a chocolate sheath dress with a matching jacket from Ann Taylor, and a large-gauge black pearl necklace with matching studs.  All of 22 at the time, I probably looked like I was playing dress-up, but hey - guess who was hired on the spot?

I get teased by colleagues every now and again, because I'm that person who refuses to indulge in blue-jean Fridays.  My coworkers are genuinely perplexed that I "dress up" every day. 

Maybe it's because my parents both wore suits every day of their lives to work.  Maybe it's because I believe in the old adage "dress for the job you want, not the job you have."  Maybe it's because I'm lazy and like having my closet divided into Monday - Friday on one side and Saturday-Sunday on the other.

It's probably a combination of all those things.  In any case, I like to look polished and professional at work.  No blue jeans (not even "dressy" blue jeans), no overtly flashy accessories, no outrageous colors, no sexy anything, no cleavage.  No skirts that end more than two inches above the knee, no pants that sit on your hips.  No loud makeup - leave the blue eyeshadow at home.  No wet hair!!!!

Yes to black foundational pieces - pants, skirts, suits, sweater.  Yes to ballet flats to wear to the office, and then black heels under your desk to change into.  Yes to printed scarves, chunky statement jewelry (a la Madeline Albright and not Lady Gaga) and sophisticated perfume.  Yes to classic jackets that can be mixed with black pants and skirts for a touch of color with a polished finish. 

Whereas my work wardrobe budget used to be large enough to allow me to shop unhindered, being a parent and a homeowner has put a serious dent in my wardrobe's wallet.  But you can still find classic pieces at reduced price points, it just takes a little more legwork.  Here are the vendors that I frequent nowadays on my tight budget:

1. Zara.  Even if all I can afford is their sales rack, this clothing store has awesome jackets, and fun accent pieces.  The sizing is definitely European, so just be (emotionally) prepared to take whatever size you are and multiply it times two. 

2.  White House, Black Market.  I have to dig through their racks, because they are a little flashy (despite the name), but I have gotten good foundational pieces here - like the black pencil skirt I wore to work today!

3.  The Limited.  This store has really changed in the last five years.  I can remember when it was incredibly frumpy, and then it got a little too edgy, but now it has settled in a nice classic space that I quite like.  I get a lot of work tops from here.  They also have really cute work-appropriate jewelry.

4.  Banana Republic.   It's hard to go wrong in this store, though lately the only place I'm looking in is the sales rack.   That being said, I still own a summer weight shirt and sweater combo that is three years old, so it's a good return on investment.

5.  Lands End - Shoes.  Their selection is getting better and better, and they have sales and discounts all the time - which, when you combine it with their all ready low prices, is hard to beat.

6.  Target.  I tend to get things like tights (black, gray, navy blue) here.  They also have a cute selection of scarves and some jewelry - though most of it will only last a season.  You can also get snag seasonal trends in button downs and sweaters here - though most cute things are snapped up as soon as they hit the floor.

Where do you do your work wardrobe shopping?

xoxo,
MF

Modern Femme at Work: Desk Drawer Emergency Kit

Oh Martha, all hail the queen.

Confession time:  my mother calls me the Bag Lady.  I can't leave my house without the security of an overloaded purse.  I like to think I put Boy Scouts all over the world to shame with my level of preparedness.  Skinned knee? Neosporin and bandaids, check. Red wine spill? Shout wipes, check.  Migraine? Advil, check.  Impromptu social gathering? Hair brush, lip gloss, compact mirror, check.  The list goes on and on.  And that's just what I take with me when running to the corner store.

So, when it comes to my office desk drawer, let's just say I'm ready for the apocalypse.  Here's a list of what I've got stashed away:

• Shea hand lotion (L'Occitaine)
• Lip balm (Chapstick and the Body Shop)
• Lipstick (Benefit Sample)
• Concealer (No.7)
• Neutral eyeshadow palate (Sonia Kashuk)
• Mascara (YSL Sample)
• Shout wipes 
• Tide Pen
• Mini lint roller
• Nail clipper
• Clear nail polish
• Mini sewing kit
• Multi Vitamins
• Fish oil capsules
• Emergency C 1,000 Vitamin C packets
• Feminine hygiene products
• Eye drops
• Toothpaste
• Dental floss
• Herbal Tea Sampler (Celestial Seasonings)
• Bag of popcorn
• Mini Tabasco bottles
• Fork, knife, spoon and pair of chopsticks

And I still think I'm missing some things.  Notice I don't have a toothbrush  (not sure what happened to it, I know I had one once!).  I could stand to add:

• Advil
• Deodorant
• Breath mints
• Safety pins
• Bandaids
• Neosporin
• Copy of my house keys
• Cream blush
• Hair clip
• Small hairbrush

I can hear my mother muttering "bag lady" to herself from here.  But I can't help it!  I need the security of a fully loaded desk.   What about y'all?  What do you keep at work for emergencies?

xoxo,
MF