Yesterday I impulsively let my excitement drive me straight into the arms of H&M, Forever 21, and Zara, where I careened madly from one rack to another, looking for some white capris. But, as I often do, I allowed my imagination to take over, and inevitably snapped up some additional pieces along the way that I simply had to have for my holiday. For fun, I thought I'd share with you all what went through my mind with each potential purchase, and give you the final "take home or leave in store" verdict:
I start at Forever 21, tearing through the store on a wild goose chase, looking for white pants. One sales associate tells me "they're on the top floor," where I run into this cardigan:
MF thought process: "Oh, wow, that's so cute. It kind of looks like a Chanel jacket. I would wear this on the way to the Caribbean, over a tee shirt and skinny jeans, and with cute flats. Very Gwyneth Paltrow. Yes, I can see it now - I'll be browsing through a magazine kiosk in the departure gate with Bebe in my arms, in this Chanel-lite ensemble, my hair pulled back in a cheeky-messy bun, diamond studs flashing in my ears, and just be the cutest mum ever."
Final verdict: Looks cute on! Chanel for the win! Take home.
Still no white pants to be found on the top floor. I see this dress on my way to flag down a sales associate.
MF thought process: "This reminds me of Aureta Thomollari. I can totally see her wearing something like this with gold sunglasses and glossy pink lips. It would look so cute on during a day of wandering through the island's market town! I would channel Aureta's effortless, globetrotting glamour!"
Final verdict: Uhhh...can't figure out how to put it on. Interior slip's straps are tangled, leaving me caught up and confused as to which end is up. My patience wears out - if I can't get the dang thing on after two tries, it's not worth it. Also, in the harsh light of the dressing room, the print begins to look a little less like Aureta and a little more like Snooki. Leave in store.
Am told by sales associate that the white pants are in the basement. No luck there either, but I do glimpse this beaded shift on my way down, no it's not a total loss:
MF thought process: "Hello you pretty thing! This is a perfect shift to wear to a celebratory birthday dinner in the tropics! The beading makes the dress - I could wear this with white patent sandals, a glossy lip, tanned skin, wavy hair and lots of gold jewelry. Sharon Stone in Casino meets Jackie O. Love it!"
Final verdict: I want this to work, but it's a shapeless mess. Bags at arm holes, lists around thighs. Sharon and Jackie would not approve. Leave in store.
I dart to the check out line, both to put myself ahead of the throng headed for the registers and also out of temptation's reach. But F21 gets me again! I see this quilted pouch and dive for it before being called to a cashier.
MF thought process: "Ohhhhh quilted. Ohhh patent leather. I needed something to hold the boys and my passports, and this chic pouch is defnitely big enough to hold all three of them and our airline tickets. Plus, it's nice and slim, and would look so cosmopolitan peeking out of my Longchamp bag!"
Final verdict: Take home slam dunk. Handed over to cashier in a nano-second.
Still unsuccessful in my quest to secure white pants, I head across the street to H&M. Hey, I'm nothing if not thorough, right? I fare no better there, but before I give up I am drawn to the shoe rack (like a horse to water), where I see these beauties:
MF thought process: "Neon pink patent leather ballet flats! Where have you been all my life? I could wear you on the island with a pair of shorts and a long sleeved striped tee. OR - I could wear these in the airport on the way home, with a pair of cuffed jeans and a blue striped sweater with gold buttons. Either way, these shoes were meant to be mine! MY LIFE IS COMPLETE."
Final verdict: No size 9 shoes. Wailing insues. Leave - sob - in store.
Final stop - Zara. I somehow immeadiately find the one pair of white capris they have left, and with laser like focus, try them on. They fit! Success!
So, just to recount, in order to buy a pair of white pants, I went through two dresses, one sweater, one travel pouch, and one - sob - pair of neon pink ballet flats. I think that's a reasonable process, don't you?
xoxo,
MF
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